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Hi @captainstarbuck,
Well, looking at the response of the last question, I’ll say the same. DigitalOcean does not recommend hosting your e-mails on the Droplets for the exact same reason you outlined in your other hosting provider. Some IPs might be on certain block lists due to the same actions you mentioned already.
If you are looking for a different behavior, the way I see it, you have two options. The first one is to find a Managed Hosting service where it provided E-mail creation and usage, maybe one that uses a panel like cPanel. The second would be to deal and contact the Blacklists you are on until the IP your Server is on is not removed from there.