There are two tutorials that I have been bouncing back and forth between. They are:

https://www.digitalocean.com/community/tutorials/how-to-secure-apache-with-let-s-encrypt-on-ubuntu-16-04

and

https://www.digitalocean.com/community/tutorials/how-to-create-a-ssl-certificate-on-apache-for-ubuntu-14-04

Neither of these tutorials actually work. I'm sure they work for some, but these haven't worked for me.

I've gone back and forth with support about this when finally they said:

I see the problem now. Certbot only attempts connection via HTTPS when using the Apache plugin. So we are going to use the manual webroot plugin instead for first time setup. Try running this command instead:

sudo certbot certonly --webroot -w /var/www/html -d domain.org -d www.domain.org

So, that creates the cert, but then the instructions don't work anymore.

I can't be the first person to be doing this. Any suggestions on what to do next?