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When it comes to Ubuntu, I normally recommend the latest LTS (long-term support) release. That’d be 16.04 as of right now :-).
To get you started, I’d recommend the following guide which covers NodeJS installation on 16.04:
https://www.digitalocean.com/community/tutorials/how-to-install-node-js-on-ubuntu-16-04
…
In terms of connecting to your Droplet, you’d need to use a terminal emulator such as PuTTy (on Windows and Linux) or the Terminal application on MacOS.
If you’ve never used PuTTy, I’d check out:
On MacOS, you’d open Terminal and run:
ssh root@ip
Where ip is your Droplet IP. You’d then be prompted for your root password.