Followed tutorials on setting up Ubuntu 16.04 server and using vnc to open xfce4 desktop. Always end up with gray blank screen. Google seems to suggest that many people who encounter this problem are using Digital Ocean. Many people claim different solutions; none of which work for me. Using debian based OS on computer, tightvncserver, and vncviewer.
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Would it be possible for you to use X2Go instead of VNC? It’s more stable for something like you’re trying and has SSH built in, which makes it more secure. http://wiki.x2go.org/doku.php/doc:installation:x2goserver
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LXDE with x2go work for root and user sign in (add <startlxde &> to .vnc). Xfce4 with x2go did not allow user sign in, only root. Thanks again, hansen.